WHAT CAN YOU SAY OR DO TO HELP SOMEONE WHO IS SUFFERING BEREAVMENT?

If you are supporting someone else following a bereavement - family friends, work colleagues - these are some suggestions that may hep you and them.

People who have been bereaved may want to talk about the person who has died. One of the most helpful things you can do is simply listen, and give them time and space to grieve. Offering specific practical help, not vague general offers, can also be very helpful.

Do:

• Be there for the person who is grieving; pick up the phone, write a letter or an email, call by or arrange to visit
• Accept that everyone grieves in their own way, there is no 'normal' way
• Encourage the person to talk
• Listen to the person
• Create an environment in which the bereaved person can be themselves and show their feelings, rather than having to put on a front
• Be aware that grief can take a long time
• Contact the person at difficult times such as special aniversaries and birthdays for example
• Offer useful practical help.

Don't:

• Avoid someone who has been bereaved
• Use cliches such as 'I understand how you feel'; 'You'll get over it; 'Time heals'
• Tell them it's time to move on, they should be over it; how long a person needs to grieve is entirely individual.

It is the human touch, the listening ear, that can be important for bereaved people.

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