How to cope with grief at Christmas

When you’re grieving, the thought of celebrating the festive season can be really daunting. It’s important to look after yourself and work out the best ways to cope throughout the season.

Supporting yourself over the festive season

•  Consider different ways of celebrating

Try planning in advance how you’ll celebrate (or not). You might like to keep to some Christmas traditions to pay tribute to the person who has died, or you might prefer to ignore the day altogether.  It’s important to do what’s right for you and try not to feel pressured into doing anything you’re not comfortable with. 

• Find ways to remember them 

This can be as simple as visiting a place that was special to them, looking through old photos or hanging up a meaningful decoration. These things can be done alone or with friends or family. For more ideas of ways to remember your loved one this Christmas, click here.

•  Accept that others may have different ways of grieving.

We know that people remember and mourn in different ways. Sometimes families can find it difficult when they have different ideas about how to grieve and this can lead to arguments. Try to be sensitive to others’ needs, and talk openly together about what will be best for you all.

•  Try to maintain a routine.

The Christmas period may disrupt your normal routine, and this can make it harder to look after yourself. Keeping regular patterns of sleeping and eating where possible can make a difference. Connecting with friends and family can help. 

•  Look after yourself

It is common to drink more alcohol over the festive period. It’s important to remember that using alcohol or recreational drugs only provides temporary relief. If you find yourself drinking to cope or numb the pain, it might be time to seek help. Get support.

• Take a break from TV

It can be tough when you are surrounded by happy images of families celebrating. If it is getting too much, consider taking a break from films, TV and social media and getting some fresh air instead.

• Allow yourself to feel

Throughout the festive season, you may experience a whole range of emotions and none of them are ‘wrong’. Feelings of sadness, anger, jealously and numbness are common, try not to push them away. You might also find moments of happiness or laughter. However you’re feeling, that’s ok.

•  Talk to someone

If you’re struggling to deal with grief over Christmas, you can call the Cruse Helpline on 0808 808 1677, see here for opening hours.