“I felt lost, overwhelmed and completely alone.”

When Richard’s mum, Maryann, died in November 2023, his world changed forever.

When Richard talks about his mum, Maryann, it’s with immense pride and affection. She was fun, talented and endlessly curious, always eager to learn something new and embrace life to the fullest.

While raising six children, Maryann was also an accomplished musician, first learning the piano before mastering the violin. But despite her many talents, Richard remembers her most as a devoted mother who always put her family first. With her sharp wit and dry sense of humour, she brought warmth and laughter wherever she went.

Music was at the heart of who she was, and it remains one of Richard’s strongest connections to her today. To Richard, she was not only inspiring and elegant, but the person who helped shape the man he became.

Like many families, distance meant they couldn’t be together as often as they would have liked. Richard had moved from New Zealand to England, while Maryann remained in Wellington.

“Because of that, every visit, every conversation and every moment together became even more precious — making the loss all the harder to bear.”

After her funeral, Richard returned to work, doing his best to carry on as usual while navigating the profound loss of his mother.

“I thought I needed to get on with things.”

But months later, on his birthday, the reality of his loss hit him.

“For over 30 years, I would call my mum in New Zealand on my birthday, and we would chat and celebrate. This time there was no conversation or celebration. That was when grief hit me like a rock.”

Suddenly, Richard realised he didn’t know who to talk to.

A friend suggested Cruse.

After thinking about it for awhile, Richard made the decision to ask for help and called the Cruse Helpline.  

At the other end of the line was a compassionate Helpline Volunteer who listened, reassured and explained the support available, helping Richard make sense of what he was feeling.

Although there was a waiting list for one-to-one support, that call gave him something he desperately needed: understanding. Helping him feel less alone, the volunteer provided a vital first step on Richard’s grief journey.

Later, through one-to-one support sessions with a Cruse Bereavement Volunteer, Richard was able to explore his feelings more deeply and better understand the impact grief was having on his life.

Looking back, Richard knows that first call was a turning point. When grief felt overwhelming, someone was there to listen, understand and help him take the first steps forward.

Thanks to Cruse, Richard no longer felt alone.

Today, Richard supports Cruse in memory of his mum because he knows how important it is to have someone there when grief feels overwhelming.

“I felt lost, overwhelmed and completely alone with my grief. From my very first call with the Cruse Helpline Volunteer, I felt heard. That first call was the beginning of a journey of support that continued through my one-to-one sessions with a Bereavement Volunteer, helping me make sense of my feelings and giving me hope that life could feel manageable again.

I’ve seen just how empathetic Cruse are. From everyone I’ve spoken to at Cruse, I’ve seen this is a charity that genuinely cares about me and my grief.

That’s why supporting Cruse is so important. When you’re grieving, having someone there to listen can make the difference between struggling alone and finding a way forward. Everyone facing loss deserves that chance.”

— Richard

Meet Liz: Volunteer Behind the Helpline

When Liz lost her father during the Covid-19 pandemic, she turned to Cruse for support during one of the most difficult times of her life.

The compassion and understanding she received helped her navigate her grief and inspired her to give back.

Today, Liz volunteers on the Cruse Helpline, providing confidential, non-judgemental support to people facing bereavement.

Every call she answers is an opportunity to help someone feel less alone. Read her full story here.

“Having someone listen when you’re grieving can make all the difference.”

Volunteers like Liz are at the heart of Cruse. With specialist training, supervision and ongoing support, they provide a lifeline to thousands of bereaved people every year.

Your donation helps us recruit, train and support volunteers like Liz, ensuring that no one has to face grief alone

Help Answer the Next Call

Every day, people like Richard – some at their lowest point in grief – reach out for support,  understanding and hope.

And every day, volunteers like Liz are there to listen and support.

But demand for bereavement support continues to grow. It costs over £600 to train just one Helpline volunteer.

Your donation could help us recruit, train and support more volunteers, so that more grieving people can get the help they need when they need it most.

In loving memory of Maryann – (September 1934 – November 2023)